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[21 Nov 2016|10:12pm]

sarahkayleighx

1. what's your name?: Sarah:)
2. age, birthday?: 23 *I'm old*
3. form of si?: cutting, scratching, overdosing, infecting cuts
4. why do you si?: release of emotions, relief, addictive, safe coping mechanism (ok I know it's not safe - maybe comforting is more suitable)
5. when was your first time? Headbanging from 5, overdosing since 8, cutting/scratching since 11
what did you use?: wall/hairbrush to headbang, any tablets I found (years later I found out they were only antacids 🙈😂) and scissors to cut
6. where do you most often si?: thighs and stomach, very occasionally tops of arms (but only in winter and if I'm not going to any parties etc. Where theres a chance people will see)
7. in what room/area do you most often si?: I live alone so it doesn't matter to me
8. what do you use?: double sided razor blades or knives...if they aren't available then anything sharp and clean...or I repeatedly scratch the same area with my nail until it cuts and bleeds after scraping a few layers off...overdose with fluoxetine...I sometimes intentionally infect my cuts (with dirt, bodily fluids, strong cleaning products etc.)
9. do you hide it?: definitely, I'm a qualified psych nurse, so wouldn't be a good role model if people saw (hypocritical maybe? More empathetic/understanding definitely!)
10. do you listen to music while you si?: Depends if it's on or not...no preference
11. anyone know?: my girlfriend (obviously, she's supportive though), my supervisor at work (I was petrified of telling her but I was having a bad day and everything came out and she is so understanding)
12. eating disorders?: nope, I do have disordered eating (doesnt everyone?) But i like to keep my bmi high so others don't notice me/find me attractive
13. mental disorders?: Depression, OCD and anxiety (on fluoxetine for this), PTSD/childhood trauma, which im recieving therapy for
14. what would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: I work with lots of people with mental illness and self harm issues so I guess my nursing skills would kick in...offer to be there if they want to talk, ensure they're safe, advise alternatives, educate them on controlled cutting and ensure they are sterile, try not to push them too much, just be generally empathetic and understanding and supportive

[break the silence]

[20 Nov 2016|04:36pm]
drowninggurl
01. Whats your name?: Emily

02. Age, Birthday?: 18

03. Form of SI?: Cutting

04. Why do you SI?: To feel something, I feel numb. I self harm for many different reasons, it depends on the situation. Sometimes I can just feel it in my veins and under my skin; a need to self harm.

05. When was your first time? What did you use?: 3 years ago - I used the serrated edge of a tape dispenser my very first time and then switched to blades.

06. Where do you most often SI?: Most often on my left upper/lower arm and wrist, but I self harm often in many other places; my entire left and right arms (from wrist to shoulder), thighs, hips, stomach, ankles,...pretty much everywhere except my face, neck, and back:

07. In what room/area do you most often SI?: My bedroom. Also bathrooms (at home and in public if I need to)

08. What do you use?: Razor Blades.

09. Do you hide it?: Always.

10. Do you listen to music while you SI?: Sometimes.

11. Anyone know?: No. My parents and close friends knew of my self harm a couple of years ago after I attempted suicide for the 5th time and was hospitalized. But no one knows now.

12. Eating Disorders?: Anorexia Nervosa

13. Mental Disorders?: Major Depressive Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Social Anxiety Disorder, ADHD (Inattentive Type), Body Dysmorphia - those are all my current diagnoses.

Possibly have Bipolar Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, and/or Schizoid Personality Disorder - but those three have not been diagnosed by a professional.

14. What would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: Probably nothing.
[break the silence]

New Here :D [20 Nov 2016|02:08pm]

nicotinesorrow
01. Whats your name?: Rhiannon
02. Age, Birthday?: 14
03. Form of SI?: Cutting
04. Why do you SI?: When ever I start feeling anxious, sad or angry those feelings build up and the only way to release them is...
05. When was your first time? What did you use?: A few months ago. I used the blade from a pencil sharpener.
06. Where do you most often SI?: Different places, upper left arm, right wrist, my thighs and my ankles.
07. In what room/area do you most often SI?: Bathroom.
08. What do you use?: Blades from expensive razors (Not as thin as disposable ones), but I'll use anything sharp if I have access to it.
09. Do you hide it?: At school and in public, yes. At home, I hide them but not as carefully because my mom doesn't really notice.
10. Do you listen to music while you SI?: Sometimes.
11. Anyone know?: My mom knows of the very first time and thinks I stopped. I've told two close friends but I believe they think I stopped.
12. Eating Disorders?: I recently started purging, so not totally sure that counts as anything yet.
13. Mental Disorders?: Depression, Social anxiety disorder, possibly Bipolar disorder (waiting on that diagnostic) and possibly ADD or ADHD (Been waiting on that one for a loooooong while).
14. What would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: Ask her why, and tell her to try and stop but if it's stopping her from committing suicide, do it if she needs while encouraging her to stop.
[break the silence]

Love to talk but don't have anyone to talk too.. so Break The Silence and MESSAGE ME! [20 Nov 2016|01:15am]

ivy_bloodstone
What's your name?: Sabrina
Age, Birthday?: 17 ( Not for long ) , November 24th
Form of SI?: Cutting, burning
Why do you SI?:  I cant control myself when im upset, also I like the look and feel.
When was your first time? What did you use?: Cutting; 6th grade, I used Crayola scissors. Burning: 8th grade, used a lighter and the end of a bobby pin.
Where do you most often SI?: My house but Id do it anywhere if I feel the need too.
In what room/area do you most often SI?: My room
What did you use?: Razor, Lighter, bobby pin, candle wax, glass, hair straightener...
Did you hide it?: NOPE
Do you listen to music while you SI?: Yes, Music is my everything.
Anyone know?: Yup I dont hide it so if people ask I just say yah
Eating disorders: No
Mental disorders: Probably but havent been made offical
What would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: Tell them I understand, if they want to talk about it I'm here.

"Cut my life into pieces, I've reached my last resort, Suffocation, No breathing, Don't give a fuck if I cut my arm, Bleeding, Do you even care if I die bleeding? Would it be wrong? Would it be right? If I took my life tonight, Chance are that I might, Mutilation outta sight, And I'm contemplating suicide" Papa Roach- Last Resort

23 broken  [break the silence]

endless grey. [17 Nov 2016|02:08am]
madriding
What's your name? My nicknames are Rocky and Russia
Age, Birthday?: 17, October 9
Form of SI?: Cutting, purging, burning
Why do you SI?: I cut/burn to release my negative emotions and I purge because I hate my body
When was your first time? What did you use?: My first time was in 9th grade. I used a serrated bobby pin to scratch myself
Where do you most often SI?: My house
In what room/area do you most often SI?: My bathroom
What did you use?: Lighters, hot forks, knives, scissors
Did you hide it?: Yes
Do you listen to music while you SI?: Sometimes
Anyone know?: My mom and 2 school friends
Eating disorders: EDNOS
Mental disorders: Schizoaffective
What would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: I don't have a best friend, but I would tell anyone who cuts that I know what they've been through, and I'd offer to clean up. If anyone here wants to talk or just needs someone to vent to, I will always be here. :)
[break the silence]

new member [16 Nov 2016|07:01pm]
isad_sadie
1. what's your name?: sadie
2. age, birthday?: 15, november
3. form of si?: cutting, pulling, picking
4. why do you si?: cutting: for the blood/i like to feel the ridges afterward, pulling: stress, picking: mindless
5. when was your first time? pulling/picking- 5 years ago, cutting: around 8 (actually started about a month ago though)
what did you use?: scissors
6. where do you most often si?: farther up my arm, thighs, ankles
7. in what room/area do you most often si?: bedroom
8. what do you use?: razors, knives
9. do you hide it?: yes
10. do you listen to music while you si?: sometimes
11. anyone know?: no
12. eating disorders?: none
13. mental disorders?: never diagnosed
14. what would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: tell her to come to me next time she hurt
[break the silence]

new member [03 Nov 2016|08:18pm]
hiddenfallacies
1. what's your name?: sarah
2. age, birthday?: 17, december 22
3. form of si?: cutting, picking, bruising
4. why do you si?: makes me feel something, distraction from mental pain, i deserve it
5. when was your first time? a year and a half ago
what did you use?: kitchen knife
6. where do you most often si?: thighs, ankles, stomach, shoulders, forearms
7. in what room/area do you most often si?: bathroom, shower, bedroom
8. what do you use?: box cutters, razor blades, kitchen knives, utility knives, nail clippers, scissors
9. do you hide it?: yes
10. do you listen to music while you si?: sometimes
11. anyone know?: a few people
12. eating disorders?: none
13. mental disorders?: major depressive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, panic disorder, social anxiety, insomnia
14. what would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: offer to help them take care of themselves and offer routes of recovery if they so desire.
1 broken  [break the silence]

Hello new here [01 Nov 2016|11:38am]
crimsonchinnnn
01. Whats your name?: Alexandra
02. Age, Birthday?: 22
03. Form of SI?: Unconventional meathods. Burning, cutting, choking
04. Why do you SI?: I feel like it helps me. I dont want to stop.
05. When was your first time? What did you use?: 12 or 13. I made thin small cuts all down both arms. My mom found out and kept my secret.
06. Where do you most often SI?: Thighs and arms.
07. In what room/area do you most often SI?:Bathroom
08. What do you use?: Cigarettes , boiling water, knife.
09. Do you hide it?: Yes but not always
10. Do you listen to music while you SI?: Never
11. Anyone know?: Husband and his siblings. My mom knows but she pretends not to
12. Eating Disorders?: Undiagnosed
13. Mental Disorders?: No, childhood trauma
14. What would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: Try to help her. She cuts too actually
[break the silence]

Yeah.... [16 Oct 2016|07:26pm]

rose01nicole
[ mood | numb ]

01. Whats your name?: Rose
02. Age: 15
03. Form of SI?: Cutting, hitting, burning
04. Why do you SI?: I'm not good at dealing with hard things. It detracts me from things I don't want to deal with
05. When was your first time? What did you use?: I was 11 years old. I used a pair of small blue scissors
06. Where do you most often SI?: My arms
07. In what room/area do you most often SI?:Bathroom
08. What do you use?:Box cutters and razor blades
09. Do you hide it?: Yes
10. Do you listen to music while you SI?:Nope
11. Anyone know?: My family and friends
12. Eating Disorders?: Bulimia
13. Mental Disorders?: Never been diagnosed
14. What would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: Try to help them to stop. Be a total hypocrite

[break the silence]

Hi I guess... [11 Oct 2016|11:15pm]

space_catz
[ mood | listless ]

01. Whats your name?: Paige
02. Age: 22
03. Form of SI?: Cutting, punching, scratching, hair pulling
04. Why do you SI?: Started out as a way to punish myself, then that turned into a way to express powerful emotions, and now it's to actually FEEL something because of how much I dissociate...
05. When was your first time? What did you use?: Well, I've been hitting myself/bashing my head into walls since I was like 5, but as for cutting, I was about 11 and I used a paring knife
06. Where do you most often SI?: My thighs. It used to be my arms, but since I have a full time job I have to hide everything...
07. In what room/area do you most often SI?: My bed
08. What do you use?: Replacement box cutter blades
09. Do you hide it?: Of course. Not that anyone really cares THAT much.
10. Do you listen to music while you SI?: Every time.
11. Anyone know?: My family thinks I've fully recovered, and my partner think's I'm currently recovering. Oops.
12. Eating Disorders?: Anorexia since I was about 11
13. Mental Disorders?: OCD, PTSD, and Bipolar disorder
14. What would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: Part of me would want to ignore it because I know I HATE when people point out my cuts, but another part of me would be like "um dude, you need to knock it off". So I guess I'm not sure.

[break the silence]

Hello [09 Oct 2016|12:05am]
alongjourney14
[ mood | tired ]

01. Whats your name?: Lizzy

02. Age, Birthday?: 25

03. Form of SI?: Cutting and rubber bands

04. Why do you SI?: I generally feel emotionally numb, so the pain (usually from the rubber bands) gives me something to feel. I resort to cutting when my depression or anxiety get so overwhelming that the rubber bands are just not doing the job anymore.

05. When was your first time? What did you use?: My first time ever was when I was a teenager (sometime between 12-14, I don't exactly remember), and I used exacto knives

06. Where do you most often SI?: My arms.

07. In what room/area do you most often SI?: I don't have a specific room or area, to be honest.

08. What do you use?: I use rubber bands and razor blades

09. Do you hide it?: Sometimes if it is bad enough.

10. Do you listen to music while you SI?: Not usually.

11. Anyone know?: Yes

12. Eating Disorders?: No

13. Mental Disorders?: Yes, just not exactly sure what yet. I just started counseling sessions and we are working towards that.

14. What would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: Ask them about it.

[break the silence]

Hello. [30 Sep 2016|01:45am]

unknownman98
01. Whats your name?: Logan
02. Age, Birthday?: 18, July 20th
03. Form of SI?: Cutting
04. Why do you SI?: For fun. For pleasure. I like the pain. And seeing and feeling the blood drip down my arm. In other words, I'm a masochist.
05. When was your first time? What did you use?: 7 months ago... Razor Blade.
06. Where do you most often SI?: Left arm, and chest.
07. In what room/area do you most often SI?: In the bathroom. Often creating blood baths.
08. What do you use?: Razor Blades.
09. Do you hide it?: I wish I didn't have to, but showing it is quite the risk. I ain't going back to another mental hospital, when I don't need to go there to begin with...
10. Do you listen to music while you SI?: No. I listen to myself groaning in satisfaction.
11. Anyone know?: Yes. My family. And some other people.
12. Eating Disorders?: Nope.
13. Mental Disorders?: Nope.
14. What would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: First of all ask why... If he said because he's a masochist, I'd be like, "Alright. AWESOME!" If it was depression based, I'd help him out.
[break the silence]

About Me [27 Sep 2016|02:24pm]

suicidalkitty18
[ mood | HeartBroken ]

01. Whats your name?: Lily
02. Age, Birthday?: 18; Feb. 27th
03. Form of SI?: Cutting, not eating
04. Why do you SI?: I feel like I deserve it, I'm never good enough
05. When was your first time? What did you use?: 13; Broken compact mirror
06. Where do you most often SI?: Shoulders, Thighs, Wrist, Feet, Behind My Ear, Inner Thighs
07. In what room/area do you most often SI?: My room
08. What do you use?: Shaving razor
09. Do you hide it?: From others yes
10. Do you listen to music while you SI?: Most times yes
11. Anyone know?: My family and friends
12. Eating Disorders?: Not "Professionally" diagnose
13. Mental Disorders?: Depression, RAD
14. What would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: I would tell them they need to stop, I hate when my friends are in pain I'm the only one that can be in pain.

[break the silence]

ugh [31 Aug 2016|12:50am]
ext_3802810
[ mood | fuck ]

haven't cut in a week, worse than usual. there goes my streak. to mania and back again. the music calms me down too..

[break the silence]

Hello... [31 Aug 2016|12:39am]
ext_3802810
[ mood | fuckin crzy ]

01. Whats your name?: Emily
02. Age: 15
03. Form of SI?: cutting//
04. Why do you SI?:ugh its stupid shit// n/a
05. When was your first time? What did you use?: spring last year, blade from a gillette razor
06. Where do you most often SI?: My hips and knees; that way its hidden/nobody notices
07. In what room/area do you most often SI?: bathroom
08. What do you use?: razor from pencil sharpener/shaving razor
09. Do you hide it?: duh
10. Do you listen to music while you SI?: most of the time
11. Anyone know?: they think i stopped (closest friends, boyfriend, family)
12. Eating Disorders?: no
13. Mental Disorders?: bipolar & adjustment disorder and um im crazy ;)
14. What would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: make her feel better but understand that its not so easy to stop

[break the silence]

Need some advice [29 Aug 2016|11:27pm]

solution_suicid
[ mood | depressed ]

Ok most of you will think I need advice on how to stop SI, but in fact I need some tips to cut deeper. I don't self harm because of the pain but of the blood and the wound. So how can I cut deeper?

4 broken  [break the silence]

hello~ [18 Aug 2016|01:12am]

marileti2003
01. Whats your name?: Lety
02. Age, Birthday?: 13
03. Form of SI?: Scratching, starving, cutting (almost clean)
04. Why do you SI?: Because fuck life, that's why
05. When was your first time? What did you use?: I was 10 or so. I used a very sharp pencil to just make some small small scratches
06. Where do you most often SI?: On my legs, arms
07. In what room/area do you most often SI?: Bedroom
08. What do you use?: My nails, razor blade
09. Do you hide it?: I try to
10. Do you listen to music while you SI?: Rarely
11. Anyone know?: My psychologist, my family, my friends, my psychiatrist (mostly everyone)
12. Eating Disorders?: Well, not sure about that. I mean, I starve myself most of the time but I'm not anorexic (yet)
13. Mental Disorders?: Depression, anxiety
14. What would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: I honestly don't know.

Well then, nice to meet everyone~
1 broken  [break the silence]

i felt like absolute hell tonight, i just wanted to let things out, [07 Jul 2016|04:42am]

sxual
[ mood | depressed ]

01. Whats your name? Kat

02. Age, Birthday? 16

03. Form of SI? Cutting, scratching, sometimes starving myself for as long as i can,

04. Why do you SI? i feel good when i cut myself. all the pain that i am feeling disappears. sometimes, something triggers me to do it, something that i feel bad about. i have to cut in order to relieve pain.

05. When was your first time? What did you use? when i was in my last year in secondary school and first year of high school i started scratching myself until my skin was pink, and it would scar really badly, on my wrists - when i was in my freshman year ( 9 ) i started cutting myself on my thighs because i knew that nobody will see them there, occasionally and with long time intervals. it got worse and i continued cutting. trying to stop, but it hurt so much, so much when i didn't cut.

06. Where do you most often SI? i cut myself on my thigh, and on my ankles because it was easy to hide with socks - i cut on my arm and wrist as well

07. In what room/area do you most often SI? i cut myself in the bathroom, or in my bedroom

08. What do you use? i use razor blades

09. Do you hide it? i do. but people don't notice because they are faded. and i try so hard to stop myself. and even if they do notice something, i am very good at changing the topic.

10. Do you listen to music while you SI? i don't.

11. Anyone know? i told a person i know online, whom i really trust and love dearly, also 2 people found out, I don't like that they found out because of their reaction and because they don't understand me.

12. Eating Disorders? i used to not eat, for days on end, at the time i didn't cut myself. but i haven't done any extreme starvation in a very long time. so i don't have an eating disorder.

13. Mental Disorders? i guess you have to be pretty messed up to hurt yourself intentionally. and hurting yourself to relieve the pain that you are already feeling, and to stop the constant sadness in your head, is already pretty fucked up. i haven't been diagnosed because i didn't tell anyone how i feel. i know that they will judge me and look at me like i am a freak. i don't want that.

14. What would you do if you found cuts on your best friend? i would share my secret with her and i would try to cope. and help her to get through what she is going through. i would tell her that, its okay, and i won't ask you to stop hurting yourself, because i know how you feel and i know it fucking hurts to breathe every day when you want to just.. and i would tell her that she is not alone. and that she can come to me any time, and that i won't ever judge her for anything.

but first, i would tell her, that i loved her, so much.

[break the silence]

New [21 Jun 2016|10:02pm]
getmeoutpls
01. Whats your name?: Bree
02. Age, Birthday?: 16
03. Form of SI?: Cutting (sometimes hitting)
04. Why do you SI?: Helps me cope and to feel a sense of control
05. When was your first time? What did you use? When I was 13 I tried using like 3 different things non worked well but I ended with the sharp end of a math compass
06. Where do you most often SI?: Switches between my ankle (left), hip/thigh area (right) and lower arm (left)
07. In what room/area do you most often SI?: Bedroom
08. What do you use?: Single blade I buy at Home Depot
09. Do you hide it?: Can't at work (short sleeve polisy) but otherwise I do my best
10. Do you listen to music while you SI?: Not usually (very very rare I ever do)
11. Anyone know?: Yes, doctors, therapist, friends, co workers family
12. Eating Disorders?: Just disordered eating but I don't see it as a problem
13. Mental Disorders?: Depression, anxiety and ptsd
14. What would you do if you found cuts on your best friend?: Ask her about it but not try to change him/her
3 broken  [break the silence]

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